Last night, on my flight back from ASCD, I read, took notes, and drew in my sketchbook. I replayed conversations I’ve had in the past few days and the kids I’ve learned from over the past 11 years. It’s all allowed me to see that it’s imperfection in where we find the real meaning in things.
Kids with disheveled hair and never considering what they say before saying it. Imperfectly authentic. Refreshingly real. Just like the people in our lives who we trust. The people that know us well enough to know that sometimes, when we resist asking for help is the point when we need it most. And they don’t wait for us to ask.
This weekend I couldn’t help but think about long it has taken me to get to this point. This blog became a place for me where I haven’t worried about perfection. Siting and quietly writing my thoughts. I rarely edit. I reflect and publish. I’ve found a place from here within myself that I never knew before. Fearless authenticity. Not only believing in what is real, writing it, saying it, and doing it. Authentic actions. Not because of what others believe, but because when you really step back and find what your heart is telling you, that’s what you need to do. Push past the fear and keep going Fear isn’t there to stop you every time, it’s there to find out how much you believe in making something happen. It’s there to shape you. Define your beliefs. Redefine your courage.
So while I used to be a master of saying, “I’m okay.” I’ve learned to stop. I’ve learned to listen to my heart. Sometimes I’m not okay, and that? It’s actually okay. Sometimes fear takes over. Sometimes I fail. Sometimes I make a choice and regret it. It’s all better than okay. It’s authentic. Genuine. And the only way to really reflect honestly and improve? Is to own it. To push through. Allow others to pull you. Own the fear so it doesn’t own you.
Keep going. The good, the tough, and everything that falls in between. Because that is the place where your heart is filled and where you become who you truly are.